Corrie weekly updates from 1995, 17 years in 17 e-books
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The main story this week has been the bringing together of the Battersby and Brown clans in the weirdness that was a Weatherfield wedding. Yes, Cilla and Les tied the knot this week, unlawfully of course, in a wedding that included a defrocked vicar, a sham ceremony, a fake cake, a locked church, stolen flowers, a Dracula DJ, drunk uncle Barry and Status Quo. Cilla's hen night saw her dressed up in a naughty nurse outfit with Yana in the Rovers. "You're demeaning the angels of our health service" said a haughty Norris while Les' stag do took place at the Weatherfield Arms with his mates from Steetcars. Cilla dragged a young man home from the pub on her hen night, thinking that Les wouldn't catch her at it, but he does. Fortunately for Cilla, Les is too drunk to remember and the next day Cilla lies that the fella was her son Billy who really did turn up for the wedding to act as Best Man. Kirk did his best in the Labours of Kirkules, even managing to capture one of Blanche's girdles in a task set by Cilla but failed to impress with tracking down a wild boar when he brought home Roy Cropper as exhibit A. Back to Billy, who turned up for his ma's bash inexplicably wearing the uniform of Le French Foreign Legion. Talking of the Legion, everyone headed there after the wedding for rock and roll with the Quo, who've eaten the buffet before the guests arrived and found themselves in an emergency hair situation. Whether the two things were connected, I really can't say. Candice stepped in as hairdresser to the stars even though she'd never heard of the band and repaired their flowing locks back to air-guitar bouncing perfection. Cilla's beside her with joy with all the presents they've received and fondles the white goods while Les is dedicating a special song to her on stage. When Les catches up with the Quo backstage, he turns all rock and roll and decides to trash their room, even throwing the telly out of the window. When Cilla catches him she batters him good and proper as Les has only gone and trashed all their presents. But it all ends well when the Quo take to the stage with Les as honorary Quo-ster and the people of the parish party on.
Violet decides to have another bash at Jason but she's left it too late. At the wedding Jason and Sarah are there alone after Sarah leaves Scooter babysitting Bethany. Jason and Sarah snog in secret and then sneak away early back to Eileen's as a distraught Violet floats around the reception in a bad mood and an awful frock looking for her boyfriend, who's playing under the bed covers with strumpet Sarah.
Elsewhere this week Danny goes to see his old mum darn in Larnden and tells her he knows that his dad ain't his dad, his uncle Mike is. There's a spot of crying and much tugging at his mother's heartstrings as well as the loose threads on her sofa. He even tries to get a bit of sympathy from Frankie too, but she's torn as to whether she should give him a shoulder to cry on or a boot up the jacksie. Mike breaks the news to Adam that he's Danny's half brother and Frankie tells Jamie he's Mike's grandson and the news dawns on them all that they're not who they once thought they were.
At Underworld, the strike's called off when Janice goes back to work after Mike makes her an offer she'd be daft to refuse. He gives her the choice of her P45 or a transistor radio if she goes back to work and brings the girls with her. She chooses the latter but Baldwin makes her go to the shop and buy batteries for it, the money for both to come out of her wages.
And finally this week, just what is Lloyd up to? Kelly's convinced he's up to no good and while we've only had a brief glimpse of him with another woman, albeit in what looked to me like a passionate clinch, I admit, I was rather hoping Lloyd wouldn't turn out to be a lothario. But this week he gets a call on his mobile phone from someone called Tina-babe and he cancels a date with Kelly to see Tina-babe instead.
And that's just about that for this week.
Glenda
By Glenda Young , writer of Coronation Street Weekly Updates for the internet since 1995. Follow the Coronation Street Blog on Twitter and Facebook
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