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Glenda was away, this week's update written by Ian Harding.
The McDonald story limps along, seemingly going nowhere. Poor
old Jim is ripped off by Steve, who still seems a bit upset that
his dad slept with Fiona. Steve seems to forget that he'd dumped
Fiona a couple of years earlier in order to marry someone else
(for money), and that Fiona wasn't even slightly interested in
Steve any more. But, this doesn't stop Stevie-boy wanting revenge
on his poor old dad so it doesn't. So he starts off when he gets
paid for the contract they've just completed. Instead of giving
his dad his full share as a partner in the business, he pays him
£300 (and 75 pence). Jim is not a happy chap, but there
doesn't seem to be much that he can do about it. Liz, of course,
agrees with Steve, but she is a bit thick to say the least.
As they are moving in to Fred's house Ashley and Maxine find
Nick and Leanne there. Maxine wants Ashley to call the police,
and is most upset when Ashley just says "Go on - scarper
you pair of monkeys" (I almost fell off my chair laughing
at that bit).
The smell in the corner shop is getting much worse. Fred gets
a friend of his in to clear the stock out of the shop in order
to check thoroughly for the cause of the awful pong. Poor Ashley
is feeling quite sick with the smell, and it seems that the smell
is clinging to him a bit. One evening, while Ashley and Maxine
are having an intimate moment on the sofa in their new home, the
romantic atmosphere is shattered when Maxine suddenly says "Eugh!
I still get a whiff when I go downwind of you........" !!!
Eventually the cause of the smell in the shop is found. Fred's
mate takes the top off the shop counter and finds the fish which
Maude hid there. Fred, I say Fred decides that it must be industrial
espionage, and blames a three fingered butcher, I say a butcher
with three fingers, who is jealous of him.
Maude confesses to Ashley that it was her who put the fish
there, but she thinks it was the right thing to do because, in
her words 'Fred is a big dollop of dripping'. (I think I'll keep
well out of Maud's way as I'm a bit chubby myself).
Leanne has been spreading gossip about Judy and Gary buying
their baby from Zoe. Nobody believes her, but this only makes
her say it more forcefully. Eventually she knocks on Judy's door
and there is a brilliant shouting match between Leanne and Judy,
which ends with Judy slapping Leanne across the face. Nick gets
a bit fed up with Leanne going on about Judy and the baby. Eventually
he asks her to stop going on about it. Leanne doesn't seem to
like being told what to do, so she dumps Nick.
The next day Leanne goes to the hostel where Zoe is living
and tells her that everyone is telling lies about her, and that
she should go back to see Judy and set the record straight. Zoe
goes back to Coronation Street........... it looks as if there's
trouble brewing for the Mallet family.
Ken is settling into his new job quite well. It seems that
Alec is providing him with a different lady every night, but purely
in a professional capacity. Jack overhears Ken and Alec talking
about the escort business and asks Alec if he could have a go
too, but Jack seems to have the wrong idea about the sort of service
that is being provided.
In The Rovers they need a new barmaid. Alec decides that he
wants to offer the job to Natalie. Jack is on Alec's side in this
and talks Vera into agreeing. So Natalie is once more behind the
bar of The Rovers. Maybe she'll last a bit longer this time.
The lying fake ex-pilot con man Jon story is getting more and
more complex. I'm not sure that I'm following it properly, but
I'll try my best to explain it to you......
He has a friend who is going to Singapore for six months, so
Jon, being a good friend offers to look after the house for him
while he's away. No sooner has Jon's friend gone out of the front
door than Jon is rifling through his drawers. He finds various
official looking documents and a driving license.
Straight away Jon is on the phone to a building society asking
if they'll send someone round as he's interested in taking out
a mortgage. Not only that, but the cheeky bugger gives his friends
name. When the chap from the building society calls round Jon
pretends to be his friend, and uses the driving license to prove
it.
The next day Jon turns up at Deirdre's flat with a present.
It's an engagement ring. It seems that he's had a change of heart
and that he does want to marry her after all. Deirdre is ecstatic
and tells all her friends. They all tell her how lucky she is
- oooh, I wish they'd read their scripts, then they'd know what
a rotter Jon is.
The next day Jon arrives at Deirdre's flat with another present.
This time it's a gold credit card in her name. He says it's so
she can buy things for their new house. Deirdre says that she
doesn't know what to do with it but Jon has the answer, he says
'You can spend spend spend!'. Unfortunately I think the silly
woman might do just that.
Jon's wife calls into Sunliners. She's decided to surprise
Jon by booking a holiday. Why she should go into a tatty back
street travel agents, when there are so many of them to choose
from is not fully explained. Anyway, Deirdre is slightly taken
aback when Jon's wife gives Jon's name, but for some reason she
spells the surname differently to Jon, so Deirdre realises that
it's just a strange coincidence.
When his wife tells him she's booked a holiday Jon tells her
he can't go as he has to go to a sales meeting. But he tells her
not to worry as he'll call into the travel agents to cancel the
booking.
Then, when Jon's in the Rovers, Deirdre tells him about the
woman booking the holiday, and how strange it was that her husband
had the same name as Jon. Jon realises that he'll have to cancel
the holiday without calling into Sunliners. So, he waits for a
time when he knows that Deirdre won't be at work, and he telephones
to cancel the holiday. The excuse he gives for cancelling is that
his daughter has been involved in a serious car accident!!!! Ooooh.......
you horrible horrible man Jon!!!
Bye for now - Ian Harding
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