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Audrey's having a bad week. First she has to tell Alma the
news that Bob has been arrested and charged with defrauding the
council. Then, Gail and Martin call her round to tell her the
news about Sarah Lou being pregnant, news to which Audrey reacts
with: "I could slap yer! Yer silly little girl, what have
you done? You're the town tart, sleeping with everyone!".
She regrets it all, of course and Alma is sympathetic when Audrey
tells her she's ashamed of how she reacted at being told she's
going to be a glamourous great-granny. "You'll be a matriarch"
she tells Audrey. An interfering, nasty, gossiping old matriarch
who nevertheless goes round to the Platts to apologise. All is
not well for Sarah Lou either in our storyline of the week. Just
as Gail finalises plans to whisk everyone off to Canada leaving
Martin to, er, liase with Rebecca in the absence of his family,
little David comes home from school with a bloody nose after he
gets beaten up defending his sister's name. The secret's out,
Candice has blabbed. Gail and Martin drag Sarah Lou off to the
school and talk to the headteacher who is quite positive about
everything and sure that Sarah Lou can continue her education
at school in a supportive environment, forgetting of course just
how cruel kids can be. "Is it mummy's girl, or just mummy?"
one of them shouts to Sarah Lou as Gail and Martin parade her
down the school corridor and out of the headmistress's office.
Roy wonders what's going on between Hayley and Stuart the builder.
Hayley's doing some naïve and innocent flirting, enjoying
the attention until Les Battersby blabs to Stuart about Hayley's
past. There's fisticuffs over the frying pan in the café
when Stuart, ego dented, has a go at Roy, who is saved from having
to fight back by Jim's timely intervention.
Fred and Ashley have a chat about family history in light of
Ken's revealations over the Cartwright murders. Fred tells Curly,
who tells Ken that Frescho refuse to sponsor his book now that
he's dug up dirt on the store's master butcher. Ken is livid,
and of course blames Blanche for opening her big mouth in the
first place. There's a great scene when Ken storms back home to
confront Blanche who's standing there with Deirdre, the pair of
them astonished to hear Ken (finally) lose his temper with Blanche.
"You daft old..." (he shouts, with a perfect pause on
his part and a sharp intake of breath on Blanche and Deirdre's
part) ..."goat!". Fred, meanwhile, is quite enjoying
the notoreity of being the grandson of a murderer as it looks
like it's making an impact on his sales of best steak and cylindrical
specialialities as the women who shop come in for some over the
Vinny disappeared this week - not into Natalie's cleavage,
as we all would have feared and Vinny no doubt, would have wished.
No, he falls down a hole while working on the Victoria Street
development, and lands on top of a dead body. Odd storyline, but
there you go. Who is the corpse? Something to do with the Cartwright
murders? Too obvious. Maybe it's Blanche after Ken got really
annoyed with her. Too naff. Maybe it's a Street male who we all
thought had left the show 12 months ago, but instead was murdered
and thrown into a hole? Too right, chuck. (No, it's not Tom -
Granada would never have given him such an interesting storyline).
Sally gets her hair cut after moaning about being too cold
out on the market all week long to deadly dull Danny (he is now
beyond bland in my book). She can't understand his unwillingness
to get one of the new units on the Victoria Street development
as he questions the validity of them both selling their very different
wares, knickers and china, together in the same shop. I reckon
pants and pots would work, don't you?
Linda wants to get back to doing more sales work at Underworld
but Mike won't let her. He does, however, agree to a date for
the wedding in September and gets her all distracted from sales
talk into organising the wedding instead. Bless him, isn't he
And that's just about that for this week. But where's the lovely
Spider been these last few weeks?
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