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Monday 11 June 2012

Coronation Street Weekly Update - July 4 2005

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Coronation Street Weekly Updates for the internet since 1995. 

The stuffed cat Sean bought from Keith last week (I can't believe I've opened an update with that line) provides much merriment at the factory when he takes it to work.  It's all a ploy to get Sean and Tim the Tall Vet together so bear with me while I make the link from the factory to furry friends, from pants to pets, from underwear and vests to understanding vets.  Sean makes on the cat's still alive to get a few laughs but Fiz rings the vet when she finds out it's dead.  Tim the vet actually makes a house cal at the factory to check up on the puss, pronounces it stuffed and goes back to his surgery with Sean's heart in his pocket. Sean's heartsick at work and can't keep his mind on his sewing. "He's made the seam one me knickers go wonky" he says. Problem is, how to tell if Tim's on Sean's bus when Sean can't pick up any signs? Kelly tells Sean that she reckons Tim's straight. "So is spaghetti until you boil it" he replies. Sean decides he has to find out if Tim's gay so he  drags Shmeichel to the surgery for a check-up on the pretence of seeing Tim again. Once inside the  surgery however, Sean gets  tongue-tied and nervous and doesn't say a word.

Norris is writing a novel and leaves his notebook in the Kabin where Rita and Emily take a sneaky peek.  When he realises they've read his very private work of fiction he decides to wind them up and the storyline twists with the main character, Naurice, having a ménage a trios with two barefoot ladies – titian haired temptress Reeba and mild-mannered church-goer Emilia – in Chester Zoo.  Rita and Emily are shocked, to say the least, especially when the story has Naurice proposing marriage to one of them.  Well, serves them right for looking.  The joke plays out as they admit they've read his  novel when they shouldn't have done but Emily takes it further and accepts Norris' proposal in the Rovers.  He needs a stiff whisky to recover before she tells him she was only joking.

Jamie moves in with Leanne at Janice's flat after arguing with Danny about his real mother Carole.   Needless to say Leanne's not keen on moving in with Jamie and sends him back home to the Baldwins while still flirting with his da.   Frankie's not best  pleased with Danny either after she finds out he'd visited Carole and hadn't told her about it. She reckons he's hiding something from her, thinking it's Carole but when she finds out it's strumpet Leanne her husband's humping she's going to get her designer label knickers in a right old twist.

Silly storyline of the week had Fred Elliot lining up to fight master butcher Maddocks after t'other butcher put posters up in the precinct deriding the quality of butcher Elliot's meat, I say, he were slandering him int' Street.   Fred prepares for pugilism by fighting Diggory in the back garden but when Diggory knocks him into a tree, he knows he's no match for Maddocks.  Unwilling to lose face, he sets up Ashley to fight Maddocks' son instead.  Ashley blanches when he hears this – it's none other than Mad Dog Maddocks, East Lancs Amateur Champ.  Better get  that hospickle bed ready.

Shelley's still in her jim-jams locked away in the bedroom wondering what Charlie's up to when he has a night out in town on  the ale.  He's angry with Shelley and frustrated too, she won't let him near her.  Mind you, if she'd done this a few months ago she wouldn't be frightened and festering under her duvet right now.  Anyway, Charlie goes out and has a few drinks and when he comes back to the Rovers, sends Ciaran home before getting friendly with Violet behind the bar.  Shelley sits on the stairs and stares at the goings on.

Scooter delivers a skip to a snooty woman in a posh house, it's all very bay window. She's not too pleased when he takes an interest in her koi carp in the garden (well they are rather shy) and threatens to call the police. But Scooter's concerned as the koi aren't in good shape and wonders what he can do to help.  Back at Gail's house Martin comes for tea as he's at a loose end on a day off with nothing to do and nowhere to go.  I hear Holby City are recruiting.

And that's just about that for this week.

Glenda 

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