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It's the final match for the ladies bowling team and Jack is dragged up
in a frock as the team's femme fatale. He looks like Bet Gilroy's older,
prettier sister and when he sees his reflection in the mirror, says: "I've
gone out wi' worse". The girls name him Ida Fagg and of course they
win the game. Vera doesn't find out what Jack's been up to and thinks he's
having an affair when she gets the reek of cheap perfume: "You smell like
Elsie Tanner on VE day". It was all supposed to be funny, a pantomime
dame in the middle of Manchester but somehow, for me, the whole thing stank
of eau de'speration for ratings and fell flat when it could have been done
very much better.
Steve brings Karen's aunty Eva to help her cope with the death of her mum.
Everyone's assuming she should be riddled with grief but Karen tells Eva she'll
never forgive or forget. On the day of the funeral, Karen's dolled up to
the nines and heads to the Rovers for Dev and Sunita's engagement party, where
she gess vey, vey drunk azza bar.
Chesney's home alone when Cilla and Les bunk off to Blackpool for the weekend
without making arrangements for him to be looked after. Fiz is away too and
his only company is Digby the biggest dog in the world. When the electricity
goes off, Chesney heads to the Harris' house to ask for money for the meter
and a dead sheep's leg, two calves and a chicken for the dog's dinner.
Tommy and Angela take Chesney and Digby indoors and look after them until
his wayward parent returns. Cilla gets a roasting from Tommy in the
Rovers, in front of everyone gathered for the dearly beloved couple about
to be wed (see earlier paragraph) about just how bad a mother she really is.
Yes, but is she bovvered? Does she look bovvered?
While the happy couple are celebrating in the Rovers (see above, twice)
Maya creeps, nay, slithers into Sunita's flat with a key she had stuck behind
her left knee. She rifles through Sunita's drawers and takes her birth
certificate. Outside she's met by some fella in a car who asks her:
"Sunita, you have what you need?". "Tonight Matthew, I'm going to be
someone not mentally unhinged" says Maya pretending to be Sunita.
Eileen's over the moon when Todd says he's returning to college to take
his A levels. The news puts her in a good mood which is just as well
as a friend of Karl and Dorothy's, Shaun, turns up looking for a place to
stay. And you have to be in a good mood, I find, to put up a screaming queen.
Eileen agrees to him sleeping on the sofa although Jason's not happy and
Todd's just bemused. Whatever, Shaun's a welcome addition and livened
up the Rovers with his beauty advice.
More advice comes by way of Blanche to Deirdre when mother tells daughter
it could have been her with Dev, instead of Sunita. "You've married foreign
once, you could have done it again" she says, before pointing out how much
of a disappointment Deirdre has been and how the sausage rolls aren't up to
scratch either. Either the Chardonnay I was drinking was especially
strong or Corrie entered a strange twilight zone at this point, but the scene
ended with Blance telling Deirdre to play another song on the harmonica, which
she did. Bizarre. Mike also had a word or two for Deirdre when he tells
her he could have been a good husband for he. "I chose the better man"
she replies "I think we both know that".
By
Glenda Young , writer of
Coronation Street Weekly Updates
for the internet since 1995.
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